It's time to completely change gears from what my previous posts have been. I have been using this forum, primarily, to share with others who have asked what I have done to be successful to this point with losing weight and getting active. I strongly believe that the most important work I have done/am doing has nothing to do with what or how much I eat or exercise. The most important, as well as most difficult, work has to do with the emotional side of obesity. The WHY I eat and don't exercise. There is an underlying story, plain and simple, that makes people get and stay fat. Most of us are gaining something by staying heavy. Whether it's protecting us from true intimacy or facing a past trauma, the weight is a protective shield from the rest of the world. The only way to get the weight off and keep it off is to face that something head on, deal with it in the context of how it causes you to relate to food, and change. That cause and effect relationship cannot remain intact if true change is going to happen.
Sometimes the people who love you the most sabotage your weight loss efforts. They may fear that you will "outgrow' them as you reach your goals. And sometimes you sabotage yourself. I have definitely fallen into the latter category. It took a long, long time to figure out that self sabotage was what was happening, not a real plateau, and the motivation behind it.
Typically, self sabotage is based in fear. For me, I feared that I would no longer be what my husband wanted me to be. All of the beautiful women in his life (mom, aunts, etc.) were heavy women and he, therefore, was attracted to "round". I came to realize that I was losing much of my round. I spent several months frustrated with my lack of weight loss progress not realizing that I was doing it to myself out of that fear.
So, what to do? Talk, talk, talk, talk, talk. My huge breakthrough moment happened when I finally had the courage to tell my husband what I thought was going on with myself. Lo and behold, I was way off base. Of course. He was indeed attracted to round, he said. Because that's the shape that I was. Now he is attracted to the shape that I am now. Because it is the shape that I am. If I end up skin and bones, he will be attracted to skin and bones. Because it is my shape. Cue the angel chorus! Once this was all on the table, I was able to move on.
I knew I had hit the nail on the head when, not hungry, I headed to the pantry. I was about to grab whatever was sweet and handy when I thought, "Wait a minute. I am loved and I don't need food to fill any hole within myself." It sounds terribly hokey but it was huge. Jillian Michaels Podcast "Living for a Greater Purpose" (6/2/12 beginning at 15:10) addresses compulsive overeating. It is from the perspective of diagnosing someone who is addicted to food and needs psychological help. BUT I found it to be highly applicable to anyone who has an unhealthy relationship with food. I was also relieved to learn that I am definitely not actually addicted to food. Just desperately in love with it! It also specifically addresses the idea of using food to "fill yourself" when not hungry and using food to numb emotions.
My own odyssey of using food to numb or create emotions definitely did not begin with my insecurities relating to my relationship with my husband though I hope it will end there. Predictably, it goes back to my childhood: I grew up in a family that did not, and does not, discuss problems. I was never told I was beautiful, loved or worthwhile. Though I was a skinny kid (for a time), I was never told that I was a healthy weight and was never encouraged to maintain that active, play outside constantly lifestyle. There was not physical affection in my childhood. What was present was money for the vending machine nearly every day that I asked for it. So food=love? No big surprise that I'm in this boat now.
It's easy enough to blame and dwell on it, but it's not the answer. It doesn't get me to where I am determined to go. Instead, I am rolling up my sleeves and doing the dirty work of looking at my issues head on, working through them and moving on. Adaptation is what we are built for and I definitely need to do some adapting.
Honestly, I have done 90% of my emotional work while running. Being out on the paths with nature as my only companion and Jillian Michaels talking in my ears, was exactly what I needed to get into my own head. I suspect this- not abusing my poor old body- is why I enjoy running so much. There aren't the distractions of every day life-or the TV in front of the elliptical-fighting for my attention. It's just me and my issues. Maybe not a very comforting thought but definitely a necessary one. So I'll keep after it, knocking them off one at a time, until I don't need to hide anymore. Now THAT is the real reward!
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Confession time: Lately, I really suck at losing weight.
So I have been seriously neglecting this blog lately. Mostly, things at home have been crazy busy with end of the school year stuff for the kiddos and home improvement projects galore. In the last couple of months we have gotten a new roof, installed solar panels, reworked the back yard a little, started the vegetable garden (cheap organic veggies!) and assembled lots of cabinets in anticipation of gutting our kitchen next week. Phew! Needless to say, I anticipate the blog neglecting going into overdrive once the kitchen project begins. We are still dumb enough to take on such things ourselves. Yes, we really are doing everything except the granite (Yay, IKEA!). Of course no such project would be complete without it bleeding into other rooms of the house. So not only are we completely gutting the kitchen, we are replacing flooring on the entire first floor as well as remodeling a bathroom. Maybe some day we will learn...but I doubt it!
Back to the blog. When hubby and I got engaged, we spent Memorial Day weekend camping in Boulder, CO. Little did we know that 55,000 others would be in town at that same time for a 10K running race called the Bolder Boulder. My interest was piqued. Why in the world would anyone do something so crazy, let alone call it fun?! That weekend planted a seed in my brain that maybe some day I would see what all the fuss was about. So I have had a long term goal (17 years is long term, right?) of some day running the Bolder Boulder. This year I was able to finally check that off my list but was left with the question of "Now what?". Naturally, all of my fans say, "Half marathon! Marathon!". To which I say, "Ha! Ha! Very funny! NOT going to happen." So again, now what? How do I continue to lose weight and stay healthy if I don't up the fitness ante? The answer is to step it up food-wise. But I really don't want to. I have cut portions and calories and junk to the point that I feel like I shouldn't have to tighten it up any further. I'm going to say it: The REAL reason I have neglected the blog is that I have been really sucking at weight loss lately. There are reasons and there are excuses but the bottom line is that I HATE HATE HATE tracking my food and it is showing with a lack of results. So I need something new to get me motivated and honest. Enter bodybugg. I do not own and have not used one but I am thinking that this may be the next step for me. All of the contestants on The Biggest Loser use these little guys (that's the black thing they wear on their upper arms!) and it gives the trainers all the information they need to tailor diet and exercise to really maximize results. Could the bodybugg help you, too? I asked two friends who are currently using the system to share their experience with us so that you can decide for yourself.
First up is my dear friend, Joe. He is a 36 year old husband and father of three gorgeous kids.
Here is my experience with the bodybugg.
I have been on a four year journey to lose weight and get back in shape. I was an athlete my entire life but after college I ballooned up to over 300 lbs. I decided that enough was enough. I started to work out, eat right, and the weight started to drop off. For the last year it seemed that no matter how hard I worked out or how clean I ate I could not lose any more weight. Three weeks ago I asked a friend, who used to be a professional trainer, to work up a nutrition plan for me. This was the only missing link that I could think of. I figured that I must be missing something so I was hoping a nutrition plan would be the solution. After an in depth conversation he explained that it is simple math. You must burn more calories than you consume. That is when he mentioned the Bodybugg. It is only sold at 24 fitness, man I hate going to the big gyms, but I went and spent the $125. The system comes with an online subscription which tracks the calories you burn. In order to view the calories you consume you need to manually enter each item. Mine came with a six month subscription.
After the purchase I was excited to get home and start using the system. It needs to be worn on your left arm to measure the oxygenated blood from your heart. It is up to 98% accurate. Once I set up the online account I had to answer about 70 questions on life style, body dimensions, and what goals I was trying to reach. The system was very simple. This is not a quick fix tool, you do need to work at it but it has been very effective. You need to login online and input everything you eat throughout the day and then at night I down load the data for the day on what my body burned. You are able to see what your body burned in two minute increments. This has been extremely helpful. I can now see how many calories I burn when I mow the lawn, wash the car, go for a bike ride or sit at my desk all day at work. I can now customize what I need to eat depending on my activity level for that day. It has also been a big eye opener to see how much an actual serving really is and how many calories I am putting in my body. I now have missing links!! The calories I consume and the calories I burn. Simple math. Burn 500 calories more than you eat each day and in one week you will lose one pound, burn 1000 and lose two pounds. I did not change my diet much but now I am very conscious on how much each type of food has. If I want a slice of pizza, great, now I know that I need to ride my bike for 45 mins to burn that one slice. It is just not worth it anymore. The first week I lost 2.6 lbs., second week another 1.8 lbs. This is not a system you need your entire life but in a few months you should be able to know your body and what you have to do to maintain or lose weight. I could not be more thrilled with the system and the progress so far. I have lost more weight in the last three weeks than the previous year combined. I did it all by just tweaking my work outs to burn more or the diet to eat less. I hope this has been helpful. I think everyone needs to do what works for them and this works for me.
And now Sarah. Sarah is a young pup who was a student of mine "back in the day" and has also had much success.
Big love,
Sarah
Listen up, Hubby! My birthday is less than three weeks away and this is the next step for me. I've made it easy for you to just click on the link. Was that subtle enough? Friends, our bodies were created to adapt. If we continue to do the same things over and over when it comes to weight loss, our bodies will figure it out and it will cease to be effective. Also, if you refuse to do the things that are proven to be effective (like tracking food consumption!), the scale will refuse to budge. I am proving this to myself again and again. I need to find a way out of this rut and I think bodybugg is the answer. Besides, it's another fun little gadget to play with!
Back to the blog. When hubby and I got engaged, we spent Memorial Day weekend camping in Boulder, CO. Little did we know that 55,000 others would be in town at that same time for a 10K running race called the Bolder Boulder. My interest was piqued. Why in the world would anyone do something so crazy, let alone call it fun?! That weekend planted a seed in my brain that maybe some day I would see what all the fuss was about. So I have had a long term goal (17 years is long term, right?) of some day running the Bolder Boulder. This year I was able to finally check that off my list but was left with the question of "Now what?". Naturally, all of my fans say, "Half marathon! Marathon!". To which I say, "Ha! Ha! Very funny! NOT going to happen." So again, now what? How do I continue to lose weight and stay healthy if I don't up the fitness ante? The answer is to step it up food-wise. But I really don't want to. I have cut portions and calories and junk to the point that I feel like I shouldn't have to tighten it up any further. I'm going to say it: The REAL reason I have neglected the blog is that I have been really sucking at weight loss lately. There are reasons and there are excuses but the bottom line is that I HATE HATE HATE tracking my food and it is showing with a lack of results. So I need something new to get me motivated and honest. Enter bodybugg. I do not own and have not used one but I am thinking that this may be the next step for me. All of the contestants on The Biggest Loser use these little guys (that's the black thing they wear on their upper arms!) and it gives the trainers all the information they need to tailor diet and exercise to really maximize results. Could the bodybugg help you, too? I asked two friends who are currently using the system to share their experience with us so that you can decide for yourself.
First up is my dear friend, Joe. He is a 36 year old husband and father of three gorgeous kids.
Here is my experience with the bodybugg.
I have been on a four year journey to lose weight and get back in shape. I was an athlete my entire life but after college I ballooned up to over 300 lbs. I decided that enough was enough. I started to work out, eat right, and the weight started to drop off. For the last year it seemed that no matter how hard I worked out or how clean I ate I could not lose any more weight. Three weeks ago I asked a friend, who used to be a professional trainer, to work up a nutrition plan for me. This was the only missing link that I could think of. I figured that I must be missing something so I was hoping a nutrition plan would be the solution. After an in depth conversation he explained that it is simple math. You must burn more calories than you consume. That is when he mentioned the Bodybugg. It is only sold at 24 fitness, man I hate going to the big gyms, but I went and spent the $125. The system comes with an online subscription which tracks the calories you burn. In order to view the calories you consume you need to manually enter each item. Mine came with a six month subscription.
After the purchase I was excited to get home and start using the system. It needs to be worn on your left arm to measure the oxygenated blood from your heart. It is up to 98% accurate. Once I set up the online account I had to answer about 70 questions on life style, body dimensions, and what goals I was trying to reach. The system was very simple. This is not a quick fix tool, you do need to work at it but it has been very effective. You need to login online and input everything you eat throughout the day and then at night I down load the data for the day on what my body burned. You are able to see what your body burned in two minute increments. This has been extremely helpful. I can now see how many calories I burn when I mow the lawn, wash the car, go for a bike ride or sit at my desk all day at work. I can now customize what I need to eat depending on my activity level for that day. It has also been a big eye opener to see how much an actual serving really is and how many calories I am putting in my body. I now have missing links!! The calories I consume and the calories I burn. Simple math. Burn 500 calories more than you eat each day and in one week you will lose one pound, burn 1000 and lose two pounds. I did not change my diet much but now I am very conscious on how much each type of food has. If I want a slice of pizza, great, now I know that I need to ride my bike for 45 mins to burn that one slice. It is just not worth it anymore. The first week I lost 2.6 lbs., second week another 1.8 lbs. This is not a system you need your entire life but in a few months you should be able to know your body and what you have to do to maintain or lose weight. I could not be more thrilled with the system and the progress so far. I have lost more weight in the last three weeks than the previous year combined. I did it all by just tweaking my work outs to burn more or the diet to eat less. I hope this has been helpful. I think everyone needs to do what works for them and this works for me.
And now Sarah. Sarah is a young pup who was a student of mine "back in the day" and has also had much success.
Hi Becky’s Blog followers!
My name is Sarah Johnson and Becky has asked me to take a moment and let you in on my little weight loss secret, the Bodybugg.
The system works in tandem between the bodybugg band that is worn on your arm which, in my opinion can best be described as a supped up pedometer on steroids, and the online program where you enter your food and data each day. I began my weight loss journey tipping my scale in December 2011 at 232lbs and have currently lost 34lbs while using the bodybugg. I’ve learned that to get the results I need it is imperative that I am held responsible for the amount I move and logging the food that I eat. You will quickly learn you truly can eat whatever you want IF you are willing to work for it. I’ve developed a realistic mindset that says, I’m 24, it is unrealistic for me to say that I’ll never consume pizza, a snickers, popcorn, bread, or even beer but I am willing to work for it. The foodie in me believes that a life without cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory simply isn’t worth having and that’s why the bodybugg vs. other weight management systems works for me. I’ve included some photos of my personal bodybugg log so you can see just what I mean about seeing every calorie that comes in and every calorie that comes out!
This dear friends, is the bodybugg
It is designed to fit snuggly around the back of your left bicep. It’s so light you barley know it’s even there!
This is a snapshot of a typical day for me.
It is important to remember that when you set up your bodybugg, not only do you get a real live bodybugg coach as a resource but the plan will be tailored fit to your lifestyle. It takes into consideration your age, height, current weight, and activity level to generate manageable calorie and activity goals.
See how you can easily tell if you are eating more than you are burning? If you are honest about what you eat and move enough to cover calories you will be in good shape (literally)! The bodybugg has changed my life and I know that I can continue this journey and even maintain my weight when I reach my goal. If anyone has any follow up questions I’d be happy to help and also strongly recommend that you check out their website!
I HATE planning workouts so I’ve decided for those of you like me who’d like to have something pre planned, here is the workout I did in the gym on this particular day.
Disclaimer: I literally ate cheesecake from the cheesecake factory the day before so I’m making up for a little bit of indulgence here….☺
Stretch
Warm up 10 minutes on the bike
LEGS
TREADMILL
ARMS
Whole circuit X2 Pick 4 or 5 of your favorite moves
X4
Burpies 1 minuteRest 1 minute
Lunges 1 minute
Rest 1 minute
Whole circuit X2 Repeat the moves you did in the previous set
10 minute stretch yoga
My name is Sarah Johnson and Becky has asked me to take a moment and let you in on my little weight loss secret, the Bodybugg.
“Combined with a user-friendly web based program*, the bodybugg system makes it easy to manage the calories you consume and burn so that you can stay in control of your weight.”-Bodybugg
Essentially, the Bodybugg is a way for you to stay on track to make sure you are burning more than you are eating every day. How many of us have stood on the scale at the end of the week and said “What happened, I did everything right?!” Well, with this tool you know exactly where those pesky pounds were procured. The system works in tandem between the bodybugg band that is worn on your arm which, in my opinion can best be described as a supped up pedometer on steroids, and the online program where you enter your food and data each day. I began my weight loss journey tipping my scale in December 2011 at 232lbs and have currently lost 34lbs while using the bodybugg. I’ve learned that to get the results I need it is imperative that I am held responsible for the amount I move and logging the food that I eat. You will quickly learn you truly can eat whatever you want IF you are willing to work for it. I’ve developed a realistic mindset that says, I’m 24, it is unrealistic for me to say that I’ll never consume pizza, a snickers, popcorn, bread, or even beer but I am willing to work for it. The foodie in me believes that a life without cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory simply isn’t worth having and that’s why the bodybugg vs. other weight management systems works for me. I’ve included some photos of my personal bodybugg log so you can see just what I mean about seeing every calorie that comes in and every calorie that comes out!
This dear friends, is the bodybugg
It is designed to fit snuggly around the back of your left bicep. It’s so light you barley know it’s even there!
This is a snapshot of a typical day for me.
It is important to remember that when you set up your bodybugg, not only do you get a real live bodybugg coach as a resource but the plan will be tailored fit to your lifestyle. It takes into consideration your age, height, current weight, and activity level to generate manageable calorie and activity goals.
See how you can easily tell if you are eating more than you are burning? If you are honest about what you eat and move enough to cover calories you will be in good shape (literally)! The bodybugg has changed my life and I know that I can continue this journey and even maintain my weight when I reach my goal. If anyone has any follow up questions I’d be happy to help and also strongly recommend that you check out their website!
I HATE planning workouts so I’ve decided for those of you like me who’d like to have something pre planned, here is the workout I did in the gym on this particular day.
Disclaimer: I literally ate cheesecake from the cheesecake factory the day before so I’m making up for a little bit of indulgence here….☺
Stretch
Warm up 10 minutes on the bike
LEGS
- Lunges X10
- Lay on back and throw pilates ball up and catch with legs X10 Bridge on ball X3 for 8 count
- Squats X10
- Frog jumps X5
TREADMILL
- Walk 5 min @ 3.0
- Increase Incline 2.0
- Walk 4 min @ 3.1
- Increase Incline to 4.0
- Walk 3 minutes @ 3.2
- Increase Incline to 6.0
- Walk 2 minutes at 3.3
- Increase Incline to 8.0
- Walk 1 minute at 3.5
- Drop Incline to 0
- Walk 5 minutes
ARMS
Whole circuit X2 Pick 4 or 5 of your favorite moves
X4
Burpies 1 minuteRest 1 minute
Lunges 1 minute
Rest 1 minute
Whole circuit X2 Repeat the moves you did in the previous set
10 minute stretch yoga
Big love,
Sarah
Listen up, Hubby! My birthday is less than three weeks away and this is the next step for me. I've made it easy for you to just click on the link. Was that subtle enough? Friends, our bodies were created to adapt. If we continue to do the same things over and over when it comes to weight loss, our bodies will figure it out and it will cease to be effective. Also, if you refuse to do the things that are proven to be effective (like tracking food consumption!), the scale will refuse to budge. I am proving this to myself again and again. I need to find a way out of this rut and I think bodybugg is the answer. Besides, it's another fun little gadget to play with!
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